This is a screenshot of my results in our end of Term 4 recount writing test. My teachers have worked out my average score for writing and I am at 4B. This is above the National Standard for my year level. I am doing great at sentence structure and punctuation. I need to work harder at organisation next year.
Title: Slumber
|
Blue! Red! Yellow! Purple! Green! I was going wild. Throwing all the colourful streamers around the room. I just love birthdays. Hearing the whirring noise of a car's engine made me leap up and rush to the door. A figure stepped out of the car. Brown hair, blue top, pink shorts! “Do you like the farm? Do you? Do you?” I asked. “Yes” said Dulcie as she pushed me to the side. As soon as Magic’s car came, we rushed into the bush.
I opened the presents. A flat rectangle? It had to be a book. I opened it carefully. Minecraft, guide to the Nether and End. I knew I would use it alot. What was the other one? It was big, round, pointy. As I opened it I realised it was a nerf, bow. “Do you always get over excited like this?” asked Magic. I shrugged. It was hard to tell. Dad told us to get on the quad bike. We piled nerf guns and bullets in the bucket. “Hurry up Sage!” Finn shouted. I felt the vibration of the quad starting to move.
I could feel the breeze blowing in my face. I was on the top of the hill. Each step I took, I could feel my feet slamming onto the soft green grass. I heard a shot. Caleb was after me. I sprinted into the trees, and saw Emma. Standing there helplessly. I carefully lifted my gun, aimed, and shot. Emma looked around, then started crying. I rolled my eyes. How did Emma get to be such a wuss? In the end, we stopped playing. We went down the hill. It was getting dark.
The red blindfold was getting tied around my eyes. We ran our finger against the white rope. Slowly and carefully we started walking. I was in the lead, then I slipped. Eventually we made it back to the end. We toasted marshmallows in the warm bonfire and sushi for dinner. Next we walked back to the house. We watched April and the extraordinary, then we went to sleep. When my friends went home in the morning, we waved goodbye, then we got to chill out. I love the holidays.
|
Title: Slumber
|
Blue! Red! Yellow! Purple! Green! I was going wild. Throwing all the colourful streamers around the room. I just love birthdays. Hearing the whirring noise of a car's engine made me leap up and rush to the door. A figure stepped out of the car. Brown hair, blue top, pink shorts! “Do you like the farm? Do you? Do you?” I asked. “Yes” said Dulcie as she pushed me to the side. As soon as Magic’s car came, we rushed into the bush.
I opened the presents. A flat rectangle? It had to be a book. I opened it carefully. Minecraft, guide to the Nether and End. I knew I would use it alot. What was the other one? It was big, round, pointy. As I opened it I realised it was a nerf, bow. “Do you always get over excited like this?” asked Magic. I shrugged. It was hard to tell. Dad told us to get on the quad bike. We piled nerf guns and bullets in the bucket. “Hurry up Sage!” Finn shouted. I felt the vibration of the quad starting to move.
I could feel the breeze blowing in my face. I was on the top of the hill. Each step I took, I could feel my feet slamming onto the soft green grass. I heard a shot. Caleb was after me. I sprinted into the trees, and saw Emma. Standing there helplessly. I carefully lifted my gun, aimed, and shot. Emma looked around, then started crying. I rolled my eyes. How did Emma get to be such a wuss? In the end, we stopped playing. We went down the hill. It was getting dark.
The red blindfold was getting tied around my eyes. We ran our finger against the white rope. Slowly and carefully we started walking. I was in the lead, then I slipped. Eventually we made it back to the end. We toasted marshmallows in the warm bonfire and sushi for dinner. Next we walked back to the house. We watched April and the extraordinary, then we went to sleep. When my friends went home in the morning, we waved goodbye, then we got to chill out. I love the holidays.
|
No comments:
Post a Comment